Transforming Families: The Power of Hypnotherapy and Unconditional Love in Parenting - SE3EP18 -Nichole Hamilton
Today, we're joined by Nichole Hamilton, a clinical hypnotherapist who specializes in working with kids across a wide range of needs, including children on the autism spectrum.
Nichole's journey through personal development, addiction, and depression has led her to a fulfilling career in hypnotherapy and unconscious healing. With over a decade of experience, a passion for unconditional love, and a diverse background in fitness, youth work, and energy healing, Nichole is dedicated to creating a safe space for healing and growth. Whether you're familiar with her from her lively social media presence or this is your first introduction, get ready to be inspired by her passion, energy, and expertise.
Connect with Nichole:
Website: https://thekidzcoach.com.au/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nichole.hamilton.587
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nichole_hamiltonchildrenscoach/
Free 5 day challenge to help you connect with kids
https://www.thekidzcoach.com.au/free-coaching
Kids and Parents retreat
https://fb.me/e/71kUz7MpT
Sponsored by Skill Samurai - Coding, Maths and STEM Academy | www.skillsamurai.com.au
AI Generated Transcription
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Welcome to the Parenting in the Digital Age podcast. Many parents are concerned that their child might be falling behind. Others are just looking for ways to help their children thrive, not just in the classroom, but socially and well into their future careers. Each episode we explore the challenges facing parents in the modern world, from behavior, education, and nutrition to device and gaming addiction. We interview a range of leaders in the area of childhood development to help you successfully navigate parenting in the digital age. Here is your host, Jamie Buttigieg.
Jamie (00:01.22)
Hello parents and welcome to Parenting in the Digital Age, the podcast where we delve into the unique challenges and opportunities raising children in today's fast paced tech driven world. Each episode features conversations with experts and thought leaders who provide actionable insights and practical guidance for navigating life as modern parents. Today we're joined by Nicole Hamilton, a clinical hypnotherapist who specializes in working with kids across a wide range of needs, including children on the autism spectrum. Nicole's journey through personal development.
addiction and depression has led her to a fulfilling career in hypnotherapy and unconscious healing. With over a decade of experience and a passion for unconditional love and a diverse background in fitness, youth work and energy healing, Nicole is dedicated to creating a safe space for healing and growth. So whether you're familiar with her from her lively social media presence or this is just your first introduction, get ready to be inspired by her passion, energy and expertise.
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Jamie (00:01.506)
Nicole, great to have you on the show. Please start by sharing with our listeners what you do and what you're passionate about.
Nic Hamilton (00:08.01)
Thanks for having me, Jamie. It's beautiful to be here. I have called myself the kids coach. I have been in personal development for the last 14 years and I am bringing those philosophies and modalities and general like healings to children. So bringing it to the younger ages. I'm 42, I've got three children myself. My middle child's neurodiverse. I've worked a lot in education and disability sector. And I've just seen where there are...
gaps that need filling for our children's development, emotional regulation, all the supports that they possibly need. And some of these things are just, you know, it's made me a better parent to be able to hold space for children with a loving nature and help them while they're struggling through it, not wait until they're in their 20s, 30s or 40s to go looking for their coaches, psychologists, help, whatever that is. So bringing them, you know, the questions that they support now. And...
As a kids coach, it's very diverse. I've got 120 across Australia now. And we've got, you know, counselors and teachers and educators and PTs and moms and nurses, all different people doing what they can to support the areas in society in education and the medical, that's just not working. So that's a snippet of Nicole, but I'm sure we can dive deeper.
Jamie (01:30.874)
Yeah, absolutely. Let's dive a little bit deeper. So what was the catalyst for you getting into healing, hypnotherapy, kids counseling, coaching? What was the catalyst for all that?
Nic Hamilton (01:43.722)
The catalyst was my own development. In my thirties, I was addicted to drugs and the medical system was failing me. I had done drug and alcohol counseling, psychologists, doctors, and nothing worked. And I had no idea about personal development, not even one, not energy, hypno, coaches. And I met this beautiful wizard of a man and he literally looked at me from across the room and I knew he was a hypnotherapist. And I tingled. I was like, what is, is he doing it now? Like I can't even, you know, look at him.
And I booked a session and it literally changed my life. I, you know, got sober, felt the internal click and I was like, wow, if somebody can hold space for me like that and help me guide me through my own unconscious, my own stuff, what else is there? So I haven't stopped studying since and it made me a better parent. I brought it home to my own children. How do you work through anger? How do we discuss that? And every time I learned, you know, another little piece of personal development.
NLP or hypnosis or breath. I was like, wow, why are we not teaching this to our kids? You know, I could relate it back to my childhood, relate it back to why I behaved and made poor choices and the strategies and the voices that we have in our heads all come down to our little teas and big teas, the traumas, the stories that we've told ourselves that we've gone through. But why not like help a child? And so I got a name here in Adelaide. People just started asking me to work with kids in hypnosis.
And I literally would say this all the time. I've got no idea what I'm doing. And I guess it's kind of a little bit of a gift. I do believe in the spiritual and God. And every time I work with a child, I could make a personal development philosophy again for kids. Give me some glitter, give me some glue, give me, you know, some chalk and I can help a child move their body and make it fun to process whatever's going on internally for them. So, yeah.
I now teach others how to do that as well, but I still work with kids myself and it just, it works. Like it, it absolutely, I was going to swear then, it absolutely fricking works. And kids just, yeah, they still pick me all the time.
Jamie (03:46.234)
Ha ha ha.
Jamie (03:51.642)
We can we can beep it out. We'll give Mary Ann, our producer, a new challenge. So there's a few beats on this one, but so far we're good. Nicole. No, nothing, nothing wrong with that. And so what are some of the common challenges or why would a parent bring a child to you for hypnotherapy? Like what are the I don't know what challenges do you see in dealing with, you know, sort of emotional and mental overload today in kids?
Nic Hamilton (03:53.866)
Bye.
Nic Hamilton (03:59.114)
I do get passionate sometimes, I can't help it.
Nic Hamilton (04:20.554)
Yeah, that's kind of it. Emotional mental overlay. Like how do they process? Every child is different, but very similar. They've got anxieties. They don't want to go to school. They're depressed. They're being bullied. They're angry. They're, you know, I work with a lot of the NDIS kids. So here in Australia, we have the beautiful NDIS system, which is for the disability. So I work with a lot of neurodiverse kids that have issues with processing, you know, different, different processing or overwhelmed disorders.
Um, but in the common denominator, same like helping them just calm with energies and show them differently. There's no, there's no one way because every child's different, but, um, helping them find the answers inside. And it's different because I, you know, I never worked with a child unless they pick me. So it's not like dragging them. And I don't mean dragging them, but sometimes you do to another, you know, school or psychologist or, um,
OT, I literally let these kids interview me from two to nonverbal, get on the floor and play up to 18, even via Zooms. And I had one yesterday, I didn't even meet the child. I knew the mom, but he wouldn't turn the camera on, but I could feel him. He engaged the whole time. And I say to him, like, if you don't want to work with this crazy pinkhead girl, I'll find you someone better. Like that's my whole job is to find you a safe person to talk to that you want to work with. And because I do that and my coaches do that.
Every single child picks me. It's a choice. We empower them and then they can open up and divulge and work on whatever's going on for them.
Jamie (05:57.53)
And in your opinion has, I mean, you're still young, right? But have have we are we seeing an increase in, you know, emotional overwhelm, stress, pressure, anger, anxiety? Are we seeing an increase in this or are we just as parents and adults becoming more aware and open to acknowledging this in our kids?
Nic Hamilton (06:20.01)
Good question.
I think there is more nowadays. I did work in the education system. I think there's a lot more diagnosis and a lot less help. I think when we grew up, I am 42, it was like, oh, you're naughty, get a smack off you go, like, you know, shut up, don't worry about it. You're a kid type of thing. And now we're a lot more aware and there's a lot more information out there. So now I guess because we're aware and hyper aware, so are they. So it's a combination of both. But...
there are a lot more diagnosis and a lot more overwhelm. And I honestly, my personal opinion is that it is because of the internet and social media and everything else, nobody gets a break. So we're all overwhelmed, not even, not just our children, all of us have that constant extra wiring in our nervous system of go, go, go. We don't shut down, we don't get outside enough. So there's a combination, but the school systems are, and even the, you know, the,
Child care systems are suffering. There are a lot of kids that need more one -on -one attention compared to what I believe when we grew up and even 10 years ago, 15 years ago in the school system. So.
Jamie (07:34.266)
Yeah, I think you talked earlier about addiction and your own journey that we're faced with another epidemic, another crisis of digital addiction, looking for that dopamine hit, that positive spike in the brain chemistry.
Nic Hamilton (07:45.182)
Mm.
Jamie (07:50.446)
and kids being addicted to, whether it's social media and that hit of the like or the social validation or whether it's in gaming. You know, we're seeing more and more of that even in our own students coming to Skills Samurai, even my own kids, you know, like it's, it's almost an uphill battle to help them find and gain a balance. Are you seeing that sort of addiction in the work that you do?
Nic Hamilton (08:05.066)
Yep, mine too.
Nic Hamilton (08:15.498)
100%. Even in my own home, even with my own business, you know, it is, it's the hit because, you know, how else am I going to distract myself? I may as well watch Netflix or get on Snapchat or TikTok, whatever it is, there's always something available. Our kids are finding sanctity in their four walls and not, a lot of our kids are not going out. Like they don't, they're not as social as we used to be at different ages. I've got a 14 year old and a 17 year old.
They're quite happy to be at home because they're getting all their hits from their friends online. They don't need to go out. So they're losing those capabilities and those social things. And the importance is sun and fresh air and grounding and outside and all of that calms our nervous system down. Yet we're staying inside, wiring up and maybe eating more food or being in that. And so it is, I try and keep my feed very positive. So it's all for great things, but I'm probably addicted to my phone too.
It's a habit.
Jamie (09:12.666)
Yeah, yeah, but the first part of that is recognition or understanding of that. It's like it's like we've forgotten how to be bored.
Nic Hamilton (09:19.208)
Mmm.
Jamie (09:25.688)
You know, it's, uh, or kids have forgotten how to be bored. We, we, we accept, or we, we think we can't be bored anymore. We're always looking for something to, as you said, to occupy our mind. And you said something interesting there about grounding or going outside and, you know, getting sunlight and say, like, just talk about your own family. How do you encourage your kids to get off devices and get outside? Uh, you know, my son looks at me strange when I tell him to do that.
Nic Hamilton (09:34.794)
Mmm.
Nic Hamilton (09:51.05)
So I guess it's role modeling. Like both my boys have joined gyms now. I'm always, not always been perfect, but I believe in body movement. I believe in club mentality. When they were younger, I'd make them get up and go for walks with me. When they were also like early teens, I would make sure that at least one day or both days of the weekend, I would just get them up and not on devices. I always found that if they started their day on devices,
you couldn't get them to engage. So I'd always make sure that there's family time where they're out and that's when their best selves came out. Their dinner outings or even dinner around the table, making sure there's that time away from that. Explaining it to them all the time, constantly about what's good about social media, what's not. Trying not to police it too much. I think that sometimes,
And every family is different. I don't judge parents how they do it. But if you tell them no, or you're turning your internet off, or you're doing that, it's making that place of they're going to hide it anyway. So I try and encourage them to make the good choices for themselves. And yeah, the most thing is role modeling. Like, you know, you can't expect it. I can't be on my phone and going, oh, you get off you get off your internet, get off your gaming if I'm distracted or I'm watching TV.
Jamie (11:15.034)
Yeah. Yeah.
Nic Hamilton (11:16.106)
Come and join me, come and do something. What could we do together? That kind of thing.
Jamie (11:22.046)
Indeed. You right at the beginning, you touched on something like early intervention. I'm not sure if you use those words, but I think we were talking about I suppose, you know, when I look at things like math tuition, I know it's an odd, you know, analogy to draw here, but.
Nic Hamilton (11:40.168)
one that we all struggle with, or some of us.
Jamie (11:42.426)
Some of us do, early intervention is something that we do, but in mental health, early intervention maybe doesn't seem like a thing. Parents kind of wait or we kind of wait to get help when something is diagnosed or when it becomes a real challenge. So what's your view on the role of early intervention in preventing future mental health challenges in adults?
Nic Hamilton (11:52.458)
Yeah.
Nic Hamilton (12:03.754)
I guess that's why I became the kids coach. Like, you know, there's a thousand coaches out there. We've got holistic and business and embodied and men's and women. Uh, you know, I'm really breaking the way to bring this stuff to the children because that's where it starts. You know, I was lonely at school and I didn't really, I knew that I was attracted, kids were attracted to me and I knew that this is where I went, was meant to go and I could feel that, but I didn't really put the pieces of the puzzles together until early last year when I did my own inner child healing. And I was like, Oh my.
I didn't feel good enough at seven when I changed schools. I started people pleasing and masking and behaving different ways. And my own mental health was suffering from seven, you know, and probably even earlier, maybe three when, you know, someone passed away. But that's when I realized like, that's why it's so important. I didn't go looking for help until I was, you know, really addicted and really fricking suicidal, you know, so that journey, if I can.
be a real life role model and help that seven year old or that 15 year old talk about their emotions now and ask for help. That's all it is. And I encourage them to continue to do that. And I have my own coaches. I model what I do. I show it to my children. I hang around beautiful communities and people now. Parents are looking for that. They really are. They're scared. And people like me who can talk deeply about addiction and
things that have gone on craziness in my own home lead the way so that people don't feel so judged or they feel like it's okay. Like, ah, I'm not the only one. You know, I yell at my kids too. I, you know. So I believe that, yeah, parents are looking because they're struggling in their four walls. If we put these podcasts out there, they've at least got it for free to go, oh my God, she's speaking my language. You know, if my cup's not full and my three -year -old has a massive meltdown, I have no capacity to handle it.
First one to yell, first one to hand in my heart. But when I've moved my body and I've had my coaching session and I've eaten really well that day, I can spend all day nurturing it and playing emotional games with it. But if I didn't have those other supports in place, I'd be losing my mind. Absolutely. Drinking more alcohol, doing whatever. I don't do that now. But yeah, so asking for help, finding things like this. I listen to a lot of podcasts as well. It's the big thing. And then modeling it.
Nic Hamilton (14:31.562)
That's what I think for the young.
Jamie (14:31.898)
And a lot parents almost feel guilty about self -care. You're talking about filling your cup. I mean, I use the word self -care, looking after yourself first. But I think you can only be the best parent that you can be.
when your cup is full, so to speak, when you've looked after yourself mentally and physically, you know, you're nourished and you're hydrated and all those those good things. So I think I'm not sure there's an easy answer to it, but I think there are parents out there that experience guilt when they try and prioritize themselves. But really what they're doing is by prioritizing themselves, they're prioritizing their family. Do you agree with that or? Yeah.
Nic Hamilton (14:49.258)
100%.
Nic Hamilton (15:09.354)
Correct. 100%. 100%. You know, we get a lot of mother's guilt, dad guilt, I'm sure as well. You know, dad, you know, work and then come home and then feel like they have to, you know, just be home, but they don't have time for themselves. So yeah, I have a wife and my wife and I try and make sure that we both get time together, time apart so that we can fill our cups and then obviously family time. And it is, it's a hectic schedule, but we do both notice and we'll check in like, well, what do you actually need? Because, you know.
You haven't had time for yourself lately or whatever else, or is it connection time, or is it even one -on -one time with one of the children? But it is, it's a bit of a stigma about it, but you will come back home. Like if you go out for a couple of hour workshop, you say to your partner, your parents to look after your kids, please, I'm going to go for this workshop. You will go into your home with a whole different energy for the rest of that week, you know, because you've made time for self. But yeah, a lot of parents, when they're in that spiral, will just, you know,
kind of like put up and shut up and, but it doesn't help because we stay in that energy. We stay in that frustration. We stay in that, that spiral. So any kind of breakout, whether it's, you know, a walk, a podcast, a long bath, it doesn't have to cost anything either. Like, you know, that's the other thing people go off. I don't have the time or I don't have the money. I get up at 4 .30 every morning to make time for me, you know, and that, and I'm an early bird, so that's okay. But you know, you can always find time.
to make sure that your health and your mental health and physical health is a priority.
Jamie (16:38.81)
Yeah, yeah, well said. Good advice to call now. My pre share research you mentioned somewhere about running sessions for both parents and kids. Is that right? And so how do those sessions, I suppose, help fostering better communication and maybe connection within families?
Nic Hamilton (16:48.266)
Yeah.
Nic Hamilton (16:58.954)
Again, I think it comes down to that modeling. Some, not all parents, but some will want to bring you their child with a problem or a situation and they want you to fix them. And that's not what it's about. It's about showing the parent the different ways to use their language, to use their energy and then model the behavior themselves. So, as I said, a hand in my heart, sometimes I yell. Do my kids yell? I think one of them does. It's a copied behavior.
So, you know, when a mom or a dad brings me their child and they're saying, you know, my kid's having meltdowns, it comes down to, well, how does your home life look like? What is, what goes on in your world? Because there's no point me teaching your child how to breathe and regulate or do something if it's happening all the time at home. Same thing with like they're disorganized, they don't clean their room. Well, how does the rest of your house look? And these are some of the real deep conversations I've had to have with parents because no point me.
helping your child and go into the home and help them clean their room if your house is just untidy itself. So it does come back to the parent -child relationship, the modeling and working on it as a whole. Sometimes I'll do sessions around the table where we all talk about our emotions and behaviors, but it just really depends on the depth of the family, like how much they're going through and what they're prepared to work on. Every family is different, but I highly encourage...
parents to sit in on the sessions for if the child wants it by themselves. I always ask the kids at the end of session, can we share? Like it's obviously it's between two of us, but is it okay if we share with mom and dad something we learn and they go teach them so that everybody's on the same page. We all kind of know where we're headed towards.
Jamie (18:45.53)
And you said something earlier about, you know, sort of parents bringing kids with problems or challenges. I guess that's normal. That's probably the catalyst for somebody. I need to get help. How do you encourage parents or do you recommend to parents like, OK, there might be someone now that this podcast is resonating with, but they look at their kin go, my kid seems OK. They're pretty well adjusted.
I don't really need this at the moment. Do you still recommend or how do you attract those parents to still because you teach kids skills that are important later in life, even though there's no perceived or obvious problem with the child, they can still benefit in my view from some of the work that you're doing, right?
Nic Hamilton (19:26.474)
100%. I think that sometimes it depends on, you know, how open communication you have, but some of the, you know, most well, um, children that are fitting in are the ones that are suffering the most. You know, they keep it inside. They might be depressed or bullied or, uh, other things going on. So just really open communication. I highly recommend that they have that other person, that safe person doesn't have to be a kids coach, but somebody else that they can chat to. So I've got uncles in the family that my boys go, you know, see, um,
there's different, you know, different places and spaces just so you've always got that other avenue. Kids will always behave differently for their parents, you know, and when a parent tries to come up with a, you know, communication or something, there's that wall up, you know, when, you know, when, when, when you, when your parents say, I love you, you're like, oh, thanks. Or they're proud of you. You're like, yep, cool. But when a stranger goes, oh my God, I've seen your work, Jamie, I'm so proud of you. You're like, ah.
you know, there's a different light up. So that's why I encourage this, you know, kids coaches, mentors to be around our kids. And it can be from anything, you know, it can be sporting clubs. It can be, you know, other, you know, amazing role models in your, in your life, families and just, you know, encourage the kids. And my oldest one who's 17 is not really interested in this stuff anymore, but he sees me do it. And I have beautiful, you know, male coaches that are still checking on him, a beautiful uncle. So he'll have, he has those avenues to, to connect with.
But if a parent's interested, it's more for them. Like if they go learn something, they can always bring it back home. So that's the other thing. Learning emotional regulation techniques for themselves, different kind of ways to fill their cup, different strategies. I think it's always of a benefit if we're learning to be a better human. So setting again that role modeling kind of example doesn't necessarily have to be for their children, it could be for themselves.
Yes.
Jamie (21:20.25)
And is all the work that you do and your coaches do, is it all kind of one -on -one or do you take programs to schools or sporting clubs or things like that? Like are they group programs or just, yeah, I'm just curious.
Nic Hamilton (21:34.506)
Every coach is different. So, you know, it's not like I'm teaching a PT course or a yoga course where we all do the same five moves or whatever. So every single kids coach, I've got 120 are different. I've got PTs, doctors, nurses, counselors, all different doing their own kind of work. Some do work in schools. I used to do one -on -one in schools. I only work myself because I'm so busy training and everything else. I do train parents. I do train groups.
And then I work one -on -one with kids, but I have previously run programs in sporting clubs and different things where it is about regulation. And yeah, a lot of my coaches now are running parent training because that's where the gap seems to be. It's like, well, I'm not okay. Like, how do I help with my child? How do I do this? So there's quite a few parenting programs that some of my other coaches are running.
Jamie (22:27.066)
That's great actually. Yeah. I think that's something that certainly as I listen, as a parent, as a, as a bloke, I'm sitting here going, that'd be kind of cool. Like understanding how to regulate my own emotions better and gain my own confidence and finding those tools and then being able to teach my kid or at least model those tools and those behaviors to my child. But many of us go through life, never having some of these tools, you know? Yeah.
Nic Hamilton (22:47.786)
So I'm full.
Nic Hamilton (22:51.818)
correct. We don't know what we don't know. I know I parent my three year old so differently than I parented my 17 year old because I've got that conscious awareness. You know where if I tell her, you know, stop crying, which I have done when she's having meltdowns, let's be real, I'm not perfect. But you know, she would say to me like later, I want to cry. And I, you know, hit me in the heart. I was like, of course you can cry. You're allowed to cry. But sometimes we still have to do what we got to do, you know.
And so the language is so important to not shut somebody down when they're going through those emotions. But I wasn't taught that. It's something that I learned through personal development. And that's why I really believe that this stuff really works and to teach it and model it for our youth.
Jamie (23:36.41)
And so there's a parent out there who's listening or anyone out there who's listening for that matter who, you know, again, might be resonating with the sound of this. You, a lot of your work focuses on training others to become kids coaches. Tell us a bit about that.
Nic Hamilton (23:51.05)
Yeah, so I have programs to help others, you know, work in this in this field, you know, and as I said, there's thousands of thousands, probably hundreds of thousands of coaches across the world, right? How many are using their beautiful talents and skills for children? And then what would the world change? So my my programs are, you know, developed for that, like, how do you start your business working with kids with the skill set that you have? So you don't always have to have a qualification as long as you've got your clearances and
ABN insurances and it's all different for different states and obviously different countries, but making sure that you're ethical and ready to go and then using that skill set with them. So it could be, you know, sporting or it could be all the way to trauma if you're, you know, a counselor or a therapist. There's so many different ways that they can work. And the only thing that in my programs is that I do enforce is my modality of connect, empower, play, grow. We never work with a kid unless they pick up. It doesn't matter if NDIS or the parent or whoever's paying.
that kid has to have the option to say, yes, you're my person. It's the only philosophy that all my kids' coaches copy. The rest, we stay in a network and we support each other. We share all our resources. We promote each other as well, like right across the board. And yeah, that's what I said. If I'm not the right person, I've got 120 across Australia, let alone other programs that other people are running. For me, it's a collab about us all rising together in the greater good to make a world full of children's coaches.
Jamie (25:16.826)
And just another curious question. So if a child comes in and you say has to pick you or say, yes, I want to continue to work with you. I mean, most kids coming into an environment or meeting a new person for the first time is going to they're going to feel different things, right? It's anxiety or stress or nervousness or whatever they're feeling at the time. But I don't know, does it take a couple of sessions to warm up or they just know and you know, like, how does it work?
Nic Hamilton (25:36.81)
Thank you.
Nic Hamilton (25:46.57)
I think it's an energy thing as well. Like all the people that I chat to, you know, they're like, kids are attracted to me. So it's just, you know, the people that I'm working with already know that their soul is here to help children. So they've, you know, they've come from whatever walk of life. Kids feel that they are, you know, they are unconscious most of the time, so they feel it. And it's giving them the choice. You know, they have the choice. I had one kid in nine years say, I don't want to work with you. I want to work with a boy and I want him to, you know, take me to the gym. But it works even on Zooms.
you know, even with a guy yesterday that didn't want to take his camera off, they feel it. And I always double check if they want to say yes. And because it doesn't matter what the parent or their diagnosis or their plan says, I always see them as a human and I want to help. And if I'm the right person, then I'll be the person to serve. And the same with all the other coaches and empowering children because they're not given a choice. They, you know, depending on your beliefs, you know, they don't get to pick their parents and get to pick their teachers, don't get to pick their doctor. That first question of, hey,
If you don't want to work with me, I'll find you someone better. It gives them that real sense of, ah, this is my choice here. And I always allow them the choice in every single session. Whereas a lot of doctors and psychologists don't do that. They're like, oh, great. You referred to me, you get me. What if they're not the right person? And you know, that's the biggest thing, like show children that they have the right choice, that not every single person is right for them, that, you know, I've been through so many counselors and coaches and...
It's that continual asking for help, like, oh, that's not quite the right person for me. That's the best thing, like letting kids feel okay to choose who they want to learn from.
Jamie (27:21.722)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, good advice. And as someone who is a mentor for kids and teens, is there a piece of advice that you find yourself constantly repeating?
Nic Hamilton (27:39.274)
I don't know actually that's kind of thrown me. I think that the one thing that I do reiterate to every child that gets to work with me is like how amazing is your parent? Like I do say that to them because if a parent's looking for the help like I say to them you know how many like if you go to a class of 30 and you've got you know four classes in your thing there's a hundred kids out of that hundred kids how many kids do you think had the courage to show up on a zoom or walk through my door?
you know, how amazing is your mom or dad for helping you find me? And I reiterate that, like that modeling so that they really feel comfortable and safe knowing that number one, they're super special for having the vulnerability to do it. Two, that their parents are amazing for looking at that. And I think that that really helps in the support and the solidifying the love and support that they've got working through whatever it is that's coming up. And that's the most important thing. Every single human wants to feel loved. Every single human wants to feel connected.
And so really helping that unit bond going forward wherever their growth might be. So that's probably one thing that I, not advice, but I kind of reframe for every child that comes through.
Jamie (28:48.602)
Make sense. And you're certainly expanding your impact, Nicole, by helping others become coaches. What's the process for someone like if they're listening now and thinking, oh, this sounds like something my calling or my life's purpose. How long does it take to become a coach? And what does it involve?
Nic Hamilton (29:03.53)
Yeah, so I have three different levels, but level one can be done. I've had coaches smash it out in a week. It's all online. So there's a lot. There's like nine modules, 35 videos plus lifetime access. So they, I'll send you my free link. I don't know if you've got it, but I've got a five day free course so people can see how I teach, how I operate and what I do, what I do share. If I'm a vibe, they can always book a call with me, see if it's right. But yeah, there's three different levels and the base, they're all online. We do Zooms as well. And, um,
Yeah, it travels across the seas as well. So anybody, anybody that's feeling this, you know, it is literally my life's work to make a world full of children's coaches, you know, out there supporting in those areas that need.
Jamie (29:46.266)
So that's a great mission and certainly an ever expanding impact. So well done on your commitment and contribution. A fun question that we like to round off the podcast with all of our guests. If Nicole could go back to her younger self, maybe as a 12 year old girl, what's one piece of advice that you'd give to yourself?
Nic Hamilton (30:04.426)
Mm.
Nic Hamilton (30:09.578)
It's a big one, but you're enough. You're perfect the way you are. You're enough.
Jamie (30:12.378)
Yeah.
Jamie (30:16.058)
Great, great advice and it's something I've been thinking a lot about on some other work that we're doing in the maths space with kids and so many kids come in with this negative self -talk. You know, I'm not good enough or I'm never gonna be good at this and it just breaks your heart, you know. I had a kid come in, eight years old saying, no, I expect this bad things always happen to me. Like.
Nic Hamilton (30:42.89)
Mmm.
Jamie (30:43.118)
You know what? Yeah, like what what had to happen in their kids minds for them to come to that conclusion or for them to have that belief. And so, you know, we try.
Nic Hamilton (30:52.586)
imagine like if that was just a throwaway comment that the parents made, like bad things always happen to us, bad things always happen to me, that gets ingrained and then that kid, he could be having the best day ever, but one thing could go wrong and he's like looking for that one thing and bad things always happen. So he's not looking through his rose colored glasses. And then yeah, so for me it'd be, yeah, a reframe. But yeah, it is like we all make it mean something about us. We're not good enough, we're broken, you know, not lovable.
I remember telling a kid once I was proud of him and he looked at me and he was so shocked. He was 13 and he's like, no one's ever said that to me before. You know, so sometimes they're telling kids that they are enough that they can, you know, whether you work with them once or 20 times over is sometimes just so powerful. So perfect.
Jamie (31:38.106)
Yeah. Well said. Great advice. Nicole, thanks for being on the show. For listeners who want to get in touch, what's your website or how do they reach out?
Nic Hamilton (31:46.762)
It's the kids coach kids with a Zed their kids coach all my stuffs on there by the way I'm running a few retreats this year for parents and kids wanting to bring harmony and connection together So they'll be here in Adelaide and in Queensland at this stage So there's plenty of ways to work with me if you want to meet me in person if you want me to meet me online All the links will be in the bio
Jamie (32:07.162)
They will put all links in the show notes. Nicole, thanks for your time, generosity and impact. We love the work that you're doing and hope we cross paths again soon.
Nic Hamilton (32:16.554)
Oh, me too. Thank you so much for having me, Jamie.
Jamie (32:18.778)
Cheers and bye for now.
If you enjoyed the show, please connect with Jamie on LinkedIn or Instagram. You'll find links in the podcast description. Parenting in the Digital Age is sponsored by Skill Samurai Coding and STEM Academy for Kids. Skill Samurai offers afterschool coding classes and holiday programs to help kids thrive academically and socially while preparing them for the careers of the future. Visit www.skillsamurai.com.au.
This episode is sponsored by Skill Samurai - Coding & STEM Academy www.skillsamurai.com.au.